My Orca Will Kick Your Orca's Trash

And by ORCA I do not mean the giant sea mammal also known as a killer whale. So every year here at BYU the Office of Research and Creative Activities offers research grants to undergrads. They are a BIG deal. No matter how you look at it getting one is a win win situation...you get MONEY, it looks AMAZING on a resume, and I get to work with my FAVORITE professor. I applied for one last year while in Vienna and was sorely disappointed when I did not receive it, traurig. Not to worry though, I applied again this year and pretty sure if I do not get it, the reader is smoking crack, and that is against the honor code. Here's a little tasty snippet of this fine piece of writing...I know it may be boring to you but trust me, it's awesome.
Importance of Project
This project will provide an interdisciplinary examination of religious texts for young children written during Germany’s colonial period. By examining the rhetorical and visual devices that conceal a politically charged agenda, this study will attempt to identify the implicit beliefs that shaped the cultural identity of a generation that would grow up to embrace the authoritarianism that fueled two world wars. It will answer the questions of how children’s literature shaped and fostered racial prejudices and it will explore the assumed cultural values that are implicit within a society that had uncritically accepted scientific notions of biological and racial determinism.

and this is the best paragraph...
Main Proposal Body
Numerous forms of media participate in upholding the ideas that shaped cultural and political movements in the colonial era: art, music, religion, literature and political discourses all play a significant role. Within these forms there may be contradictory voices, but we can nonetheless identify trends and prevailing themes that constitute a general cultural consensus that is readily apparent and explicitly stated. By carefully analyzing the various discourses, we can also identify more powerful, but less visible, forces shaping the cultural identity of entire nations—a set of implicit ideas, beliefs or assumptions that are so widespread and so universally accepted, that they inform all discourses in a given culture but are rarely, if ever, stated outright. Thus, all texts (in the broadest sense of the word), even those that seem to comprise a culture’s most politically innocuous genres, have the potential to be complicit in upholding paradigms of imperialist expansion and racial domination. This project proposes to offer one of the first explorations of colonial literature for children under the age of ten, by examining a series of religious picture books entitled Missionbilder mit Versen für Kinder (Images of the Missions with Rhymes for Children) published in Berlin in 1904, at the height of Germany’s colonial period. Coincidentally, 1904 also marked the beginning of the Herrero wars in the colony of German Southwest Africa where the German Colonial troops eventually exterminated over 60,000 African natives. Children’s literature, which fosters cultural norms and shapes a child’s national and racial identity, offers a glimpse into the implicit cultural mindset and pedagogical agenda of a nation on the verge of genocide.

Now I know that some of you are thinking...huh? But this is amazing stuff and so fun to talk with my professor about! Anyways, it consumed my life for a good week and I am pretty sure it was worth it. Look out Shamu...

Camille Your Imperfections are Showing...

I have so much to say and no way to articulate it. First off it's a new semester and that means so many new things. Classes are amazing this semester, I have 3 art history classes Byzantine Art, American Art, and Modern Art, they are all amazing. I am learning to read art like never before. I am developing a deep appreciation for artists and people who push the envelope and our comfort zones. I love artists who expand our definition of beauty. I love my major. I have also been having this deep inner battle between doing something I love or something that is practical. I feel this deep obligation to find one thing that I am incredibly good at, when in all reality I should be learning how to be incredibly good at something that I love. I had been looking into getting a second bachelor's in nursing and I started looking at the classes and I just thought to myself "yuck, none of those sound appealing." That is not the attitude I want to have about life! I was trying to reconcile the difference between sacrificing and service and if I could somehow make both of those work within art history. Then I realized (with the help of my dear sweet mother) that I could. I can do something that I love and that doesn't make me a bad person. I realized that Heavenly Father wants us to be happy and art history makes me happy. Ah, sweet relief. I also found a graduate program that is so perfect I could pinch myself! So in other words I am pumped about life and what I have to offer. Sometimes I get scared of the possibility of succeeding. Somehow not trying seems like a safer option but just like those artists who push our comfort zones and perceptions of beauty Heavenly Father leaves me sweet reminders that it is all possible. Success is attainable and it is a righteous desire. I am so excited!!!!

A Story

I have come to realize that one of my favorite things in this world and one of my truest and deepest desires is to have a story. Odd I know, however I love the idea of it. I have often described it as wanting to be interesting and that is true...I really want to be one of those fascinating people to talk to. Someone who can relate really well. I am not talking one of those "one uppers" the "yeah well I did this" types. I am talking those really cool people who have just happened to have been someplace or tried something but it has only made them completely grounded and down to Earth. When I watch my video on the other side I want to laugh, cry, and have a deep satisfaction like the kind you get from a good story. Those stories where you completely connect with the characters and you root for them, you cry with them, you ache for them, you see their flaws and weaknesses you watch them grow and progress, and finally you feel more complete because of their story. That is the kind of character I want to be, the story I want to have.

Bye Homo

My sister and her delightful little family came to visit for the 4th of July. My niece is highly entertaining. Now for an explanation of the title...we went to visit our dear family friends the Holmans and as we were leaving we told Maddie to say "Bye Brother Holman," as we often tell her to say things because it sounds so much cuter coming from her. Instead of "Bye Brother Holman" she said "Bye Homo" in her little two year old voice and garble. We all tried not to laugh but it was hilarious. The weekend was filled with "Kameal come on..." and how could I resist that? Following her around made me realize what a discovery this world still is to her. As adults (I don't think I can classify myself as an adult yet...it just sounds weird) but as we get older I think we lose sight of what an amazing world we really live in. When was the last time you got excited about a flower? What I worry about seemed so insignificant compared to how easily entertained and happy Maddie is. As the scriptures say we should become like little children.

I don't know and I don't have to.

So I am home for the summer. It is refreshing not to have to worry about rent and class and feeding myself and all of those pesky responsibilities. There are however those pesky comments of "what are you up to these days?" The response may as well be an automated machine..."if you'd like to know Camille's major press 1, if you'd like to know her relationship status press 2, if you'd like to know what she is going to do with a degree in anthropology press 3, if you'd like to know why as a 21 year old she is neither married nor on a mission yet press 4...I have the responses down pat. As I having been thinking about the future and all of these false pretenses I have set myself I came to a conclusion. I have no idea what the future holds and that my friends is glorious.

I swear this is an original idea all of my own...

Haha just kidding. I decided to copy Brit...as I read his blog I too realized how many people there are in this world that I love so dearly. How many people do you know will bake a pie for fun, go to the Grand Canyon on a whim, make you laugh uncontrollably...ah I could go on and on but needless to say I am blessed to know and love amazing people!

A Very Pleasant Weekend

It has come to my attention after some harassment from my dearest brother that I do not update my blog frequently enough. He has a valid point but I just hate to toot my own horn all the time. While there are plenty of my thoughts that are blog worthy if you will somehow I just can't find the time to share them...this is my attempt at a life update and perhaps some of those blog worthy thoughts I just mentioned.
So this last weekend was an excellent one. It involved a low key Friday, golfing, an amazing Rachel Yamagata concert, an enlightening Sabbath, and pie. It really doesn't get any better than that. Brit and I went to the concert and when we first got there I had my doubts about its validity. We had to stand outside for an hour before they opened the doors...boo. However once it started it was delightful, one of the guys that opened for her was really good, Greg Laswell, he is becoming a new favorite. She was just as good live which always makes me happy, and it was fun to hang out with Brit as always. Golfing was fun, although I am still baffled as to how I made it on any golf teams ever in my life, maybe I should stop telling people that I was on multiple golf teams as it creates a kind of expectation that I never meet. It was still fun though and it was really nice to be outside.
Last weekend I went to Vegas to see the cutest little girl, I just adore my niece. I know I am biased but she really is just about the cutest kid I have ever met. It was nice to be all together, my parents came and Brit was able to get work off so it was the whole gang minus Andy. Maddie now knows my name and I must say it makes me especially happy. It is so nice to hear her yelling for you from the top of the stairs. Beth said she woke up asking for me the day after I left and I felt so special. A child's affection really is the greatest.
Other than that life is grand. I am just working and going to school which keeps me really busy. My life plan is up in the air but I tend to get irritated with those people I meet on campus who have everything planned out to the "T" I think it will be a rude awakening when they see their plan crumbling because Heavenly Father has a different one in mind...sometimes I wish he would tell me mine but I guess that would ruin the fun...or something like that.